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Sunday, December 4, 2011


I was talking to a guy last night who knows that I'm in recovery. Now I don't run up and down Magazine St. yelling "I'M IN AA!!!!", but I don't hide it. Quite proud of it actually. It means that I've taken control of my life and am working every single day to make myself a better person.

AA is a program of attraction, not promotion. I feel if I've attracted just one other suffering person into it, I've not only helped them in some way, but I've done one more thing to ensure my sobriety. I wont be ready to sponsor or do H & I for a while as there are certain requirements, but we are all encouraged to help others in any way we responsibly can.

My biological mom asked me to be her sponsor last time I talked to her. That's why I don't call her much anymore. Right now she isn't good for my recovery. I still like to make sure she's ok, but that's about the extent of it.

Anyway. Back to the guy. He's a really good person, but he feels he has a drinking problem. He came to me and asked what I know about medical detox. I told him that they would sober him up, get him past his withdrawal stage, and probably turn him loose to drink again. I've never been in a medical detox unit, but I know plenty who have. Don't get me wrong, I've done rehab and pre-rehab, spent a weekend in an emergency room one time, but never been admitted to a hospital for the express purpose of getting me through DTs safely.... I'm rambling again.

I invited him to come to a meeting with me and he recoiled. Alot of folks have the misconception that AA is a religious organization, some kind of cult, or that they'll lose themselves somehow. I had those misconceptions at varying times of my disease. His big problem is surrender. I told him that was a key part of the program. You have to surrender your will to your Higher Power or the program simply isn't effective. My Higher Power is God. I told him that, at one time, I had the exact frame of mind he does... and I kept going back to drinking. I couldn't recover. I had to put my pride and ego aside, open up to God, and allow him to take the bad stuff away. It's an entire step in AA. Step 3.

Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we
understood Him.

We have plenty of athiests in the program who find some kind of Higher Power. Even if it's the program itself. It works for them.

He promised that he would come with me to one meeting. I told him not to promise me, but promise himself. It's all up to him. I can only tell him what I know about it and give encouragement. Hope he comes, though. I invited him to my homegroup on Thursday. If it looks like something he's interested in, I'll introduce him to my sponsor. He can do a much better job of this than I can right now. Plus I have to stay focused on my recovery.

That was a long one and I hope I wasn't too all over the place with it. Learned alot from just writing it, though. I know I'm on my 5th step, but I thought I'd put up the 3rd Step prayer... Goodnight.

God, I offer myself to Thee — to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!

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