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Monday, January 30, 2012

Tearing Down Walls and Cooking Cajun Style

It was a great first day off. Made a couple of meetings and I made some jambalaya. I've kinda missed cooking. I may even look into getting a small grill to take to the parades with me during Mardi Gras.

Was reading the thought for the day earlier and it was about loneliness...

A drinking life isn't a happy life. Drinking cuts you off from other people and from God. One of the worst things about drinking is the loneliness. And one of the best things about A.A. is the fellowship. Drinking cuts you off from other people, at least from the people who really matter to you, your family, your co-workers, and your real friends. No matter how much you love them, you build up a wall between you and them by your drinking. You're cut off from any real companionship with them. As a result, you're terribly lonely. Have I got rid of my loneliness?

I complain about being lonely sometimes. I'm not totally alone, though. I have God and I have people who love me that I can call at any time of day. I find fellowship in meetings and in church. Those are things that I'd walled out of my life while drinking... and even when I was sober but not recovering. I try not to cry when I imagine all that I missed in that horrible time. It makes me wish I could go back and love like I should have. That's a futile thing to do, however. Can't change the past. We can only learn from it.

Have I gotten rid of my loneliness (as the passage asks). No. Not completely. But the walls are no longer there. That means that I can definitely make the present and the future better for me and my loved ones. I can connect with them and grow with them. It's a beautiful feeling.

This isn't a "woe is me" post, by the way. Just sharing what I got from the thought. I'm in a pretty decent mood and am getting ready to watch some American Pickers and Pawn Stars. My international friends may have to Google those shows... LOL. They're fairly popular here.

Well. I'm going to settle in. I hope you have a great evening and a blessed tomorrow!

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