Was just reading the Thought for the Day in the 24 Hours book. I can remember only too well the duress my blowing money in bars and liquor stores put on me and my loved ones. What was it for? A few hours of feeling better about things and hiding from feelings? The selfishness of that is mind-boggling. Hiding was a very expensive habit. And thinking about what that money could have been better spent on makes me cringe.
I not only paid in money, though. I paid for addiction in pain, relationships, fear, anxiety, and failure. So when folks in the program say that you get an automatic pay raise, they mean it in other ways too.
Actually being there for the ones you love, not living in fear of being found out about something, waking in the morning without feeling like you are going to die, ...having a bright future ahead... Those things are priceless.
What a load wasting money puts on your shoulders! They say that members of A.A. have paid the highest initiation fee of any club members in the world, because we've wasted so much money on liquor. We'll never be able to figure out how much it was. We not only wasted our own money, but also the money we should have spent on our families. When you come into A.A., that terrible load of wasted money falls off your shoulders. We alcoholics were getting round-shouldered from carrying all those loads that drinking put on our shoulders. But when we come into A.A., we get a wonderful feeling of release and freedom. Can I throw back my shoulders and look the whole world in the face again?
Goodnight, my friends.