One of the most beautiful things my recovery and my blog has given me is all the wonderful people they've brought into my life. The following is a response to a previous post from a new friend in Europe. The reason that I am so fascinated and wanted to share is that it is not only her story, but mine and so many other people's in our position. Tragic, but not unique. Thank you, Riversurfer!
"The thought of the day had me thinking that drinking alcohol was something I always could rely on. I knew what alcohol could give me, a trustworthy old friend. I knew it would be me myself and I in a life free from friction, dwelling in the dark room. Not expecting any unpleasant surprises, just me and my love for the alcohol. It gave me a sense of control... I was the queen of my very own dark room.
Oh, and how I loved it and how it at the same time was killing me. The alcoholic so content and happy in its blessed ignorance - whilst the core of what me was in despair, only wished to die.
Dealing with life sober is undescribebly different from the days that was with drinking. Life is so rich, so beyond my control. It's scarey but oh so rewarding. I very much love this magnificent and eternal that is life and gladly turn my back to that horrible dark room.
Good night and sweet dreams!"
I'm so blessed to have folks like Riversurfer in my life. You keep me sober... Thank you again! :)